Looking after our wellbeing can often take a back seat to the demands of work, family and everyday life. For many men, the pressure to stay “on” and keep moving can make it difficult to pause, reflect or reach out for support.
In this edition of Men Connect, we’re sharing a Q&A with one of our own, Donncha Lynch (Head of Sales), on his experience with When No One’s Watching (WNOW) - a global community focused on supporting men’s mental, physical and emotional wellbeing.
WNOW brings men together through movement, conversation and connection, creating space to step away from the pressures of work and life, and focus on overall wellbeing. Through this, it encourages open conversations and helps normalise the importance of looking after your health.
In this Q&A, Donncha shares his personal experience, insights on the importance of connection, and some simple, practical ways men can look after their wellbeing - even when life gets busy.
If you’re interested in learning more or getting involved, you can visit the WNOW website here: Visit WNOW
When No One's Watching (WNOW) - A Q&A with Donncha Lynch
How would you describe WNOW to someone who hasn’t heard of it before?
WNOW is a men’s wellbeing and connection group that brings men together through movement, conversation and community. On the surface it might look like a group going for a walk, swim or coffee, but underneath it’s really about connection, support and creating space for honest conversations.
For many men, it becomes a circuit breaker from the pressure of work, life and everything else going on. It’s a place where people can show up exactly as they are without judgement.
Who is WNOW for?
Honestly, it’s for any man. Some of the fathers that attend do bring their sons along especially during school holidays.
You don’t need to be struggling or going through a crisis to get value from it. Some people join because they’re dealing with stress, burnout, health issues or loneliness. Others come simply because they want better balance, stronger routines or more connection.
A lot of men spend years focusing on work, providing for family and pushing through life without really checking in on themselves. WNOW gives people permission to pause a little and reconnect.
We usually meet at 6am on Wednesday mornings. This is our Sunrise sessions, but many of the chapters now have extra sessions such as walking groups, golf groups, social nights out etc so if you can't make the Wednesday there is still loads of opportunity to connect. The format of the session is;
6am start warm up, gentle stretch, light exercise, Circle of Trust, dip in the ocean, coffee and home / work.
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You spoke about “taking the body armour off” - what does that mean to you in practice?
For me, it means dropping the constant pressure to always appear strong, in control or unaffected.
A lot of men wear armour without even realising it. We get conditioned to keep moving, solve problems, stay busy and not really talk about what’s going on underneath. Over time that can become exhausting mentally and emotionally.
Taking the armour off doesn’t mean falling apart or oversharing. It simply means allowing yourself to be human. Being honest when things are hard. Accepting support. Opening up a little more. Slowing down enough to actually process what’s happening in your life.
Ironically, I think there’s real strength in that.
Why do you think it can be difficult for men to speak up or acknowledge when things aren’t okay?
I think many men grow up believing they need to “hold it together” all the time. I grew up in a house in rural Ireland with a very strong father figure, surrounded by 4 brothers. Showing weakness was never something I would do, so I bottled up my feelings and frustrations.
There can also be a fear of judgement, appearing weak, burdening others or losing control. Work pressures, financial responsibilities and family expectations can all add to that.
The challenge is that a lot of men only talk once things have become really difficult. We’re often very good at functioning externally while struggling internally.
Groups like WNOW help normalise conversations around wellbeing before people hit breaking point. The Circle of Trust ( see the photos attached ) is the safe space post exercise during our Sunrise session where we can share something positive or get something off our chest.
What has your involvement in WNOW taught you?
It’s taught me the importance of connection and consistency.
When I became seriously ill a few years ago, it completely changed my perspective on health and wellbeing. I realised how much I had prioritised work, stress and busyness over myself.
WNOW helped me reconnect with some simple but important things:
- movement
- routine
- mindfulness
- breathwork
- sleep
- community
- being present
- spending more time with family and friends
It also reminded me that a lot of people are carrying things you can’t necessarily see from the outside.
What are a few small but meaningful steps men can take to look after their health - even when work and life are busy?
I think people sometimes overcomplicate wellbeing.
For me, some of the biggest improvements came from small consistent changes:
- getting outside more
- walking regularly
- reducing alcohol intake
- improving sleep habits
- eating healthier
- spending less time constantly “on”
- connecting more with good people
- taking breaks from screens and noise
- learning simple breathing and mindfulness techniques
You don’t need to overhaul your entire life overnight. Small habits done consistently can make a massive difference over time. Think James Clear and Atomic habits. The 1 percenters.
If you could share one message with others reading this, what would it be?
You don’t have to carry everything on your own.
Most people are dealing with something, even if it’s not obvious. Reaching out, connecting with others or asking for support is not weakness , it’s actually one of the healthiest things you can do.
And often the first conversation is the hardest one. At WNOW we task ourselves to reconnect with a old friend and it's such a powerful exercise.
If someone was interested in getting involved with WNOW, where could they start?
The best place to start is simply by showing up. Leaning in and giving it a go.
Follow WNOW online at wnow.org, come along to a session, bring a mate and just experience it for yourself. There’s no pressure, no expectations and no judgement.
It’s a very welcoming community and you quickly realise you’re not the only person trying to navigate the pressures of life, work, family and health.
Lastly, I've attached some photos to give you a feel of WNOW. The photo with pink Jersey is from the Annual 60KM walk we do each year in honour of the 60 men that pass from suicide ever hour Globally.
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We’d like to thank Donncha for sharing his experience and insights so openly.
If you’re interested in learning more or getting involved, we encourage you to explore WNOW or reach out to Donncha to have a chat!
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